Listen, can you hear your heartbeat? What is it telling you? Is it beating slow as you sit down to read a book? Or are you on the elliptical machine and maybe it is beating faster than it should. Or maybe you just saw your favorite person and your heart even skipped a beat or two!

Recently, I was on the phone in my office at work and a gecko popped up unexpectedly from underneath my desk and appeared on the wall in front of me, giving my heart a quick jolt. I even left out a little scream of surprise, which may have caused my heart to stop for a second or two!

At night while lying in bed, if I listen closely, I can hear my heart slowly winding down from the busyness of the day. Also, while sitting quietly to meditate, I feel my heart slow down with each breath that I take. In that silence, I know that my heart is listening to what my body is telling it and reacting accordingly.

While thinking about this, it made me wonder if I purposely had to engage my heart to really listen to someone else, and how often during the day is my heart truly engaged in the listening process. I guess that is where the phrase, “let’s have a heart-to-heart talk” comes from. Maybe, when you are not engaged, your heart is not really listening to all the non-essential chit chat of the day, or it could be listening on a subconscious level.

I have found that listening is a life skill that is most valuable In all my career choices, I have found myself in the situation of resolving conflicts of all types. Conflicts between businesses, conflicts between co-workers, and between business and client. Not only do conflicts appear in your place of business but they take place in our personal lives. Conflicts happen between family, friends, neighbors, husbands and wives. Sometimes you may even get a scolding while driving your car. Unfortunately, nobody is going to escape a conflict free life, as much as you may try.

Personally, I do not like conflicts of any type. Being that they are unavoidable, I have found when I am in one of those uncomfortable situations, I must step out of my comfort zone and listening becomes my greatest tool.

Let’s face it, most people, when irritated, have no problem expressing how they may feel, especially if they feel that they have been wronged in some shape or form. Sometimes just listening to someone blow off steam is all that it takes for things to settle down. Tolerating those moments and emotions can be trying for sure. However, everyone wants to feel as though they have been heard. Maybe you can’t always come to an agreeable solution to the conflict, but just the act of letting the other person spew out their side of the story is all that it takes to resolve the issue. If you are listening from the heart, it will be notable in your body language. Most people can feel and see whether you are mentally engaged or somewhere else and that you really don’t give a hoot about the truth of the matter.

Quite often, people are not listening because they are thinking about what they are going to say next. Yes, that is fine to have bullet points that you need to interject in the conversation, However, if you are truly listening from the heart, you may have to change your agenda. Too many times, it becomes a priority to get your two cents in rather than listen to someone else.

I have spent a good deal of my life working on becoming a good listener. Almost to the point that I can verbally state what the other person is going to say before they say it. It seems as though I can intuitively express what they may be feeling. I firmly believe that it is a result of practicing how to listen from the heart.

Most of my career has been spent in some form of sales and marketing, where listening is a necessity to find out the needs of the client to validate the purchase of a product. During training sessions throughout my formative years, I spent hours and hours role playing with supervisors and co-workers addressing this specific topic. Have you ever encountered a salesperson who talked themselves right out of a sale by talking too much? Too much talking and not enough listening is tiresome for some people. In most cases, the buyer gets frustrated and tired of listening and may even walk away. If you are attentive, and listening from the heart, you would pick up on those signals well in advance.

If you listen from the heart, your relationships will improve on all levels. Whether it is in a personal relationship or a business setting, really listening will reward you by enriching your life. You may be amazed at what listening from the heart will teach you. It may even save a relationship or two along the way.

Every conversation can be quite intense and draining, if you spend it with your heart totally immersed. Non-essential day to day chit chat could potentially become cumbersome. It does not mean that you are not listening when you engage in conversation, your intuition will tell you if you need to get your heart involved and you really need to listen from the heart.